Film Studies 192A: Week 5

reinvigorate by melody

I can feel the reasons why I want this to be completed, but there are physical things that are holding me back. This isn't about the physical, this is about "that feeling." I can never describe that feeling because it is so special to me that I have never even tried to explain it. Somewhere the generalizing to say "that feeling" makes it known to me that it is too special and too well known for me to even externalize or find any physical meaning to it. I hear the three songs and get nervous thinking how this image can be manifested with those melodies and "that feeling." It's the physical setbacks and the un-confidence that may hold me back. I don't like being un-optomisitc. I am not, but for some reason I seem to be right now!

All I can do is wait and hope, then work work work, and realize I put so much emotion and thought in to this that either way it was meant for something and I can be proud. I am amazed how pride so often in this time comes from places that I would never justify for myself but those people who do source their pride from illegitimate reasonings, get away with and mask their invalid power. How often am I tricked to think I am lower than these invalid claims of confidence. My modesty hides from me, how much I deserve. This prompts me not to be more arrogant, but I need to remember the way in which I do things and that my intentions are personal and emotional. I am so contradictory and "deep" that any explanations that I try to give just sound shallow. The deeper I think, the denser my ideas sound as I externalize them. I just need to remember that difference is not wrong, and things that are fully exposed, even though they are known or somehow "tradition" does not mean they are invalid, but should not make me feel like I am invalid.

"That feeling" right now feels good and it kind of only comes when I am alone, and sadly, when I am feeling a little vulnerable. It is when I am quiet and can clearly remember how these ideas come to me and why I find them special enough to initiate.

Film Studies 192A: Week 4

imMEDIAte grasp

teaming up

IVDV and Reel Loud

I'm part of planning TWO film festivals this month, which are both in May. Actually the submission screening day of one, is the date of the event for the other haha. Here are the submissions and a brief description of each:


(First Annual)
Submission date: Friday, April 25th
Festival Date: May 10th @IV Theater
Digital Film Festival
Various categories; prizes and awards for each



(17th Annual)
Submission date: May 9th
Festival Date: May 23rd@ Campbell Hall
Silent Films with live musical accompaniment
This year's theme: Past, Present and Future Cinema


Submit! Play! Attend!

Film Studies 192 A: Week 3

Film Studies 192A: Week Two

Film Studies 192A: Week One

filmy update

This weekend I began on-set production of my new short film. Here are some of the highlights!

workin it

Responsibility comes a long way. If you prove to someone that you are dedicated and responsible, they won't forget. They will come to you for future projects. When you are entrusted in a project to lead yourself you will see how important it is to find responsible people to support and surround your project. Working with irresponsible people is frustrating but a good lesson nonetheless...